Summer is here (at least it is in California) and that means lazy poolside days, drinks with frilly umbrellas, and ideally, enjoying a smooth and frosty exotic concoction at an outdoor tiki bar.
I mean, who doesn't love tiki? The grass skirts, the quirky carvings, the beautiful wahini in sarongs, the fancy cocktails that will knock you flat on your ass. What's not to love?
Well, actually, I found something.
The Tiki Buttplug
This certainly puts the "OOOOOOH SHIT" in Mahalo!
This here Really Fucking Big Kahuna is aptly called "The Island Explorer" and is one of several lines of "silicone insertable art" produced by Whipspider Rubberworks.
Yes, they really call them insertable art.
Based off the famed, mysterious Easter Island heads, The Island Explorer is "designed to challenge and satisfy those who enjoy advanced anal play. Made of our soft, durable silicone in a beautiful marbled bronze it begs to be taken... via gentle coercion or sometimes savagely. This demi-god was designed to be worn and holds firmly in place when inserted to its comfortably shaped base."
Do you know a loveable tiki nerd who has *everything* tiki related and is impossibly hard to shop for? Well, now you know what to get him/her for Christmas. You're welcome!
And if that's too much for you, try this smaller version:
(Stay tuned next week for more fine selections from this line of toys!)
It's so cool I want to put it on my shelf.... Do you think people would realize?
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